Tuesday, October 12, 2010
My child is driving me crazy when he..............!
There are times, as a parent with an older adopted child, that your child's behavior drives you absolutely crazy! (Strangely enough, the same behavior may not effect your partner in the same way) Time to calm down! This is the time to take a 'time in'. Firstly, notice the 'huge' reaction in response to the behavior of your child. This signifies a 'trigger' reaction to your child's behavior. The more we learn what these are the better to guide our children from negative patterns of behavior. Give yourself some space and time away, to be compassionate with yourself. I sometimes go and sit on my meditation cushion during these times and sit for 5 minutes (informing my daughter that I need to do this and will be back soon!). Notice the enormity of the feeling and how it is impacting your body, heart beat, pulse, breath , and the negative thinking about yourself and your child. There is a lot going on! Give yourself at least 5 in and out breaths , allowing more time on the exhalation. (as this calms the nervous system) Once calm, it is easier to think about and respond with appropriate consequences and responses to the child's behavior.