Friday, August 26, 2011

parenting during stressful times (5)

Tip 5

THINK CONSEQUENCES RATHER THAN  PUNISHMENT. IT HELPS TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN ACTING OUT FEELINGS AND BEHAVIOR.  All of this is best said and done when you and your child are in an emotional equilibrium again and the problem-solving/reasoning part of the brain can be receptive to consequences and reasoning; compassion and forgiveness. (encourage a change in behavior by saying “today you had a difficult time …….. maybe tomorrow you will do better. If it is better tomorrow then maybe you can/we can……(positive incentive) but right now you will need to……. ) Also, if you do ‘lose your mind’ even though temporarily, it is very important to say sorry.  It can also be useful to say what you have learned about yourself from the situation and what steps you will take to change how you interact during those stressful times.  What positive incentives, which involve relational connection, can you identify? How do you talk about consequences with your child?

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